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My name is Beansy

  • What do you think of this idea for a short story? Constructive feedback only please ?

    Once upon a time there was a little boy called Drew Murty and he lived in a tent in the woods called the wood of pigs and he had to poop in a shed because of the snakes that lived in the toilets and one day he decided he was sick of having to poop in a shed because of the snakes in the toilet so he went on google to find out how to get rid of snakes except he couldn't get on Google because there is no internet in the wood of pigs so instead he got on his bicycle and rode all the way to nodnol which is another name for london and arranged a meeting with robin hood and peter schmeichel and he asked for their advice and they suggested that Drew Murty should hire the pied piper of hamlin to get rid of the snakes but when the pied piper of hamlin arrived at the wood of pigs he said sorry drew murty I don't specialise in snakes so then Drew Murty cried and the pied piper of hamlin went lol what a loser so Drew Murty punched him in the face and put his pipe up his bum and thr  Drew Murty arranged a meeting with Andy Cole who said he doesn't really know much about toilet snakes but he thought they could be killed with a nuke so Drew Murty got back on his bicycle and went to north korea and bought a nuke for tree fiddy and came back to the wood of pigs and nuked the toilet snakes and they all lived happily ever after apart from Drew Murty who was killed in a nuclear explosion. The end.

    1 AnswerBooks & Authors5 days ago
  • Is it safe to ride a bicycle indoors?

    I want to go on a bike ride but it's raining and I don't want to get wet

    4 AnswersCycling5 days ago
  • Can you teach hamsters to do tricks?

    Me and my buddy sneebsy want to get a hamster and take it to the pub and get it to do tricks so that people will give us money so we thought some good tricks would be to ride a unicycle and throwing darts

    1 AnswerRodents5 days ago
  • In the uk is it legal to have sex with someone you don't live with?

    Under current coronavirus restrictions I think it's ok to have sex with a stranger in a field but not in a house. Is that correct?

    6 AnswersLaw & Ethics1 week ago
  • Is it ok to pick a rabbit up by the ears?

    I can't think of any other way to do it without the rabbit biting me

    3 AnswersOther - Pets1 week ago
  • When is the best time to release a hamster?

    I have two hamsters. They’re called Drew Murty and Mr MacWee. I’ve noticed that they don’t seem to like each other. It’s a shame but I don’t think they can cohabit any longer. I’m going to release Mr MacWee into the wild. 

    When is the best time to do this? I’m thinking as hamsters are nocturnal then early evening, just as the son has set would be best. 

    Should I just release him in my back garden, or will he come back in the house if I do this? Would I be better to drive him into the countryside before releasing him?

    6 AnswersRodents1 week ago
  • Who discovered how to milk a cow?

    I love milk. Seriously. I love it. But the first person who looked at a cow and thought "I'm going to pull on those udders and drink whatever comes out" must have actually been insane

    13 AnswersCooking & Recipes1 week ago
  • What's going on with these eggs?

    I always get 6 eggs with my weekly shopping. I like a boiled egg every day for my breakfast. But not on a Friday. Never ever on a Friday. I'm a devout catholic so I can't eat meat on a Friday. Anyway. This week the shop accidentally sent me a box of 10 eggs. That's too many for me, and I've already ordered 6 for next week. I've read you need to be careful with eggs and their sell by dates so rather than take any risks I thought I should freeze them. Anyway, a few days later I went to the freezer and the eggs had burst. Does this mean the eggs were fertilised and a baby chicken tried to get out?

    10 AnswersOther - Food & Drink1 week ago
  • Oh no I accidentally voted for Joe Biden?

    I was in the voting booth and I accidentally voted for Biden instead of the great Donald Trump. We need a leader who truly understands how to beat covid - not one who hides behind a mask. How can I get my vote corrected?

    2 AnswersElections1 week ago
  • What's your favourite meal at McDonalds?

    I like to get 20 mcnuggets with 4 bbq sauce to dip them and I get a large fries and a double cheeseburger. I get a smarties mcflurry for after. To wash it down I have a diet coke.

    14 AnswersFast Food2 months ago
  • Why is it so hot?

    President Donald Trump needs to do something about how hot it is. My suggestion is he sends Space Force towards the sun with fire extinguishers and orders them to reduce the sun's temperature. If this doesn't happen then I will almost certainly vote for Joe Biden. He will get things done.

    4 AnswersPolitics2 months ago
  • Why does this keep happening to my toilet?

    After I do a poo the poo always sticks to the side of the bowl. It's nasty. And theres always skid marks in the bottom of the bowl. It's embarrassing 

    12 AnswersMen's Health3 months ago
  • Which dinosaur is the best?

    My favourite is the triceratops.

    6 AnswersPolls & Surveys3 months ago
  • What's the best way to hide the smell of sweat?

    Since working from home I feel like showering every morning is unnecessary as I only see one person all day. For environmental and financial reasons I'm now only washing once a week. I think it's for the best. It also allows me longer in bed in the morning. 

    What's the best way of making it so I don't stink for when I want to make love to my wife?

    21 AnswersMen's Health3 months ago
  • How do I stop my fat wife from eating nutella?

    Seriously. She sits there and eats it with a spoon. All the time. Now she's fat. She even eats it when she's in the bath. 

    3 AnswersDiet & Fitness3 months ago
  • Do babies have finger nails?

    My wife is due to give birth soon and we were wondering, when the baby comes out will it have long finger nails? Presumably it will have some, and won't have had access to any nail clippers in there. Will we need to cut the baby's nails? Do you get special small baby sized nail clippers or can we use adult sized?

    5 AnswersNewborn & Baby3 months ago
  • How come people don't like wearing masks?

    They seem like the best way to ensure that the secret 5g surveillance cameras don't realise what we're up to

    3 AnswersGovernment3 months ago
  • Rabbit question?

    My wife and I bought a pet rabbit for our daughter. She loves the rabbit. They're best friends. However, my mother in law came over last night and thought the rabbit was food. She's from a big hunting family, and she's always killing things to eat. So, she went to the hutch and hunted our daughter's rabbit and skinned it and baked it into a rabbit pie. We all ate the pie, including my daughter, as we didn't realise it was our pet rabbit. It was pretty good. But how do I explain to my daughter that her granny killed the bunny rabbit and then my daughter ate it?

    1 AnswerOther - Pets3 months ago
  • What does monkey blood taste like?

    I got an ice cream the other day and the man in the ice cream van asked if I wanted monkey blood on top. That's the weirdest question I've ever been asked

    6 AnswersCooking & Recipes3 months ago
  • How do I become a priest?

    I know the bible. Basically there's adam and eve and a snake makes them eat a apple and god kicks off and then there's moses and he writes the ten commandments and Noah makes a boat for animals and god drowns everyone else and then the baby jesus comes along and feeds everyone bread and fish and turns water into wine and then the Romans kill him and he sings always look on the bright side of life.

    6 AnswersReligion & Spirituality3 months ago