Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 8 months ago

How do I get over the anxiety of my BF getting tired of me and leaving me?

We've been together for almost a year now. I have strong feelings for him, but because it's a new relationship for me after a 15 year failed marriage, I feel less in control than I ever have in my entire life! Help!

4 Answers

  • Linda
    Lv 7
    8 months ago
    Favourite answer

    A year isn't that long being in a relationship, but at least it's better than a few months. I can understand how you would feel insecure dating someone after a 15 year marriage ended. Try to remember that this new guy is not the man you married and doesn't deserve to not be trusted unless he did something to make you feel uncertain of him. The anxiety and worry about something that might or might not ever happen will only add more stress in your life and in your relationship. Work on letting go of the past and enjoy what you have and try not to compare things that your bf says or does to what your ex did. As time goes on, it should get easier and easier to trust him. Hang in there and best of luck to you both!

  • 8 months ago

    If you're not feeling secure about the relationship then he must be doing something to cause you to feel this way

  • 8 months ago

    That’s why the say love is really just a leap of faith. I’ve had trust issues so definitely know how you feel. It really takes a lot of time and energy to always worry about that though and after you’re with someone for long enough that feeling normally goes away. 

    I’ll tell you though, if you start showing this side of you. Weak, scared, insecure .. it could make your partner feel a little ... repulsed.. trapped. I was just like you.. I got way better and funny enough once I worked on myself .. I was able to be confident enough to accept things for what it is.. not get so hung up on what you can’t control because again ...

    Love is a leap of faith. If you want to guarantee that you don’t get hurt .. then don’t date. Otherwise deal with these emotions. That’s the hard truth. Not what you want to hear when you have trust issues BUT it’s really what it comes down to. There’s no magical answer that’ll make you feel better here 

  • Jerry
    Lv 6
    8 months ago

    Trust issues? If he hasn't given you any reason to not trust him, you have to go with it. All you can do is the best you can do... Does he know how you feel about him? I'd be surprised if he doesn't suspect it...does he return those feelings to you? If there's a yes in there...about all you can to is keep the faith ...

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