Lance asked in HealthMental Health · 2 months ago

Why am I so afraid of moving out on my own?

I am 37. I have always lived at home or with a fam member. Why am I so nurvious/afraid to live by my self in my own place? I have some saved money to help me along, I plan to live not to far away from other fam members. But still I am so worried before I even move. It has kept me from moving at times. The only thing I can even think of is the being alone part. It will be just be just me no gf. So I will have went from living in places where there was always someone there, someone to talk to, someone making noise. To just me all quiet, day in and day out. Seeing as I can't drive because I have epilepsy I am limited on getting out, cats and dogs are not the same as having people there talking walking by going in and out. I thought about a roommate but I just don't trust people that much. How do I get over this fear of living on my own, I am going to have to at some point. 

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    It’s normal and you have a disability. And that’s an American cultural thing to look askance at somebody your age still living with their family. 

    Because other cultures are more family oriented. 

    This culture fosters divorce and break up of families. That’s the American way. 

    In some other cultures nobody would think there was anything unusual about somebody your age still living with your family. America is fvcked  up that way. 

    And I don’t blame you not trusting people. I got slapped with a mental illness label at a fairly young age  even though I don’t believe I am or ever was, But it was just the way my dysfunctional family felt threatened by me since I was the only sane member of the family and they didn’t like that. 

    So they labeled me the one with the problems instead of fixing their own.

     And sent me to the psychiatrist to be lobotomized with the psych drugs. End of story. End of whatever satisfying future I could have had.

    Game...set....match

    And now OF COURSE I’m in Social Security disability so I’m like a pariah in this society. A total loner because nobody wants to have anything to do with people like me. 

    So I don’t trust people either. Why the fvck should we?

     But I was forced to start living on my own when I was about 19 years old. I am in my 60s now. Because my fvcked up dysfunctional family basically didn’t want me in their hair. 

    They wanted to be free to do their own thing after my parents got divorced they just wanted to fvck around and have a lot of sexual relationships and not be burdened with me. So what can you do? 

    People suck and this hyper-materialistic, sexually depraved, anti-family culture we live in sucks. I don’t know what to tell you about adjusting to living on your own. 

    I had a dog for about 16 years and then she died. I didn’t always treat her that well but she was a good dog and she kept me company. She was like my child I guess. 

    Then I became a real father although a very fvcked up one and am now divorced just like my good old parents got divorced.

    So I have my own child now. And I’ve been a lousy father. 

    But maybe you can get a pet to make a living on your own more tolerable.

    A dog or a cat. Cats are OK but dogs are even better because you can take them everywhere with you. Well almost.

    I know you didn’t ask for my life story and I’m not sure why I gave it to you. 

    I guess it’s just like everything else I do in my life. Wasting valuable time because I know I don’t have much of a future anyway.

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  • 1 month ago

    I can understand your fear. Who will help you when your condition flares up? Maybe you should always live with someone you trust and who is looking out for you.

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  • Steven
    Lv 4
    1 month ago

    Many people have same conditions, to live happily they try to trust someone who understand them and in this world all people are not same, so try to trust someone who really loves you..  

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  • 2 months ago

    you are insecure, but I am sure everything will work out.

    • mni1 month agoReport

      be confident  ....

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  • 2 months ago

    Firstly, u always "lived at home or with a fam member"- dont really make sense  

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  • 2 months ago

    dont worry life alws free path

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  • patty
    Lv 6
    2 months ago

    maybe get a pet eg budgie, fish

    • Lance2 months agoReport

      All you gave such great answers and they were so true thank you all

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  • 2 months ago

    Now that we can interact with other people online, alone is no longer so alone as it used to be. If you could commit to having a dog as a companion animal, you will almost certainly find it to be a social ice-breaker in the sense that it enables other people to feel easier talking to you. It may also be trained as a support animal for your epilepsy.

    • Lance2 months agoReport

      All you gave such great answers and they were so true thank you all

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  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    i know someone that lives alone and she has epilepsy and she does okay, maybe you can get a service dog to help you out

    • Lance2 months agoReport

      All you gave such great answers and they were so true thank you all

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  • 2 months ago

    If you have money saved and you have steady income, you should not worry. It sounds to me you have no hobbies or interests. Find something you enjoy doing. You will meet friends that way and perhaps, your future spouse.

    • Lance2 months agoReport

      All you gave such great answers and they were so true thank you all

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