Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 month ago

How do I cut off my parents?

I’m 18 and the youngest of my siblings. My parents have tanked my other siblings credit scores by stealing their money and using it irresponsibly. Now my adult siblings are in debt and stuck living at home to be continuously used. I am afraid of ending up like them. My parents have done way worse things that I’ll spare the details of but my point is, even as a child I was certain I didn’t want a relationship with my parents when I became an adult. TECHNICALLY I am an adult now and my family’s dynamic is only getting worse. I had a social worker from Child Protective Services, but CPS can’t do anything now because I’m an adult. How do I go about cutting them off? I don’t have my license because my parents never allowed me to learn how to drive. I have my passport (which expired in 2012), my social security card, and my birth certificate in my possession. I also don’t have a bank account because they haven’t allowed me to get one. I also don’t have a job because my parents haven’t allowed me to get one. If I hypothetically just packed my stuff and started living with a friend, could they call the police and say I’m a runaway? Because it’s been very clear that they are dedicated to keeping my siblings and I living at home. I just feel trapped.

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  • Carmen
    Lv 4
    1 month ago

    First of all 18 yrs old mean you can’t get in trouble if you choose to leave your parents home but be wise about it never bite the hand that fed you or leave on bad terms and have to return try to still be respectful peaceable and approachable until you can do better and look into getting either a up to date passport or enhanced license if needed this will help you get a job and open up more opportunities pray for guidance endurance a calm heart and peace of mind and remember you can’t change your parents only yourself and your life don’t give up. 

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  • 1 month ago

    Pack your stuff and move out. It should take 1 year or two to save some money. First, you have to save some money.

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    You're an adult, you can get a job, pack your bags and leave. Once you have a job, it should be fairly easy to open up a bank account and renew your passport. Find somewhere cheap to live (yes, live with a friend with possible, rent a room, get a room mate etc.) and save up for license.

    I moved out at 17, taking just my clothes, school books etc. with me. My parents were furious, but there wasn't much they could do about it as I was thiiis close to turning 18.I'm not going to lie, it was hard, sometimes if I got an unexpected bill, I'd have to live on oatmeal and instant noodles for weeks, but it taught me independence, and although my parents had already instilled me with the value of money and hard work, this really cemented it.

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  • 1 month ago

    You are an adult now , (and I know they are keeping you from so much because you didn't know that they cannot keep you there or have police go after you. ) I would say stay and work till you get a car ...etc.. but I think your right and you need to get away AS SOON AS POSSIBLE, because if you don't you could end up like your siblings and that would be tragic. I so sorry you have had to grow up this way , but I'm proud of you for seeing it all as it is , and your strong enough to leave !! I wish you  all the best ! Good Luck !.............you are free now , if you let yourself be ....

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  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    maybe you should turn them in for that

    • Edna
      Lv 7
      1 month agoReport

      Turn them in to WHO and for WHAT, Pearl?  CPS won't get involved because he's an 18-year-old adult. The police won't get invovled, because he's an adult.

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Wow. No you are 18. Just run away.

    Tell the cops if they find you everything you just said. That they are controlling and abusive. Better yet leave to a other city. Find a job. Roomates or be homeless and find a job or a squat. Be safe though. Dont get raped.

    • walmeis
      Lv 7
      1 month agoReport

      The phrase "running away" implies doing something wrong.  A more appropriate phrase would be "just leave".

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Your parents are toxic and of course you need to break free.  The other problem you have is your older siblings not setting a good example.  I feel bad for them, because clearly your parents are horrible, but it's puzzling they didn't get some solid advice on how to handle what was happening.  If your parents literally stole from them, they should have pressed charges.  That's just one example, though.  There are ways they could have dealt with this and escaped. 

    Now that you're an adult, your parents can't report you as a runaway.  The cops will laugh at them.  If you have a friend who will let you stay there, there is ZERO reason for you to feel trapped.  Get out today!  With every hour that passes, you're at increased risk of ending up like your siblings.  When people wait too long, they're actually afraid to do it.

    One other important thing:  Now that you're an adult, it's illegal for your parents to try to prevent you from leaving.  In fact, it's kidnapping (holding another adult against their will).  Between now and the time you leave, call the non-emergency # of the cops.  Explain that you are leaving home and there may be resistance from your parents.  Ask what kind of help can be provided.  Every single city and town in the US has procedures for this.  It's often a sheriff's deputy.  They will come to your home and wait while you gather your stuff and leave.  Don't be afraid to do this, because as horrible as your parents are, they're still your parents and you're at big risk of them doing or saying something that gets inside your head.  Your departure should be without notice and extremely quick.  There's no need for you to say anything to them.  In fact, if you can leave while one or both are gone, that's ideal.

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  • 1 month ago

    As you are 18, no they cannot, and even if they do the police won't do anything.  Just leave, don't tell them where you are going and just leave.

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  • 1 month ago

    You have an old contact in the CPS so call them and ask their advice as to where you could go or what you might be able to do.  As an adult you can actually do what you wish.  You DONT have to stay at home with your  parents if you don't want to and you can be pro-active and get yourself a job.  Get some advice and good luck

    • Edna
      Lv 7
      1 month agoReport

      chris n: CPS means Child Protective Services. He's not a child - he's an adult! CPS would just tell him to get a job and move out of his parents' house.

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Do something stupid while rioting.

    • ...Show all comments
    • H1 month agoReport

      Thank you for the history lesson Edna! Not the point of the comment though

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