How do I tell my bf I might be pregnant?

We have been together for 3 years. We agreed in the beginning that we would have no kids, no marriage no buying a house together. He had two miserable realtionships that gave him his sons who are half brothers with a significant age gap of 10 years. We had always been careful and I use the calendar method. Before anyone freaks my gyno recommended this method as I was one of the unfortunate who suffered from blood clots caused by the pill that landed me in the er coughing blood put of my lungs from the multiple pulmonary embolisms I had. I also have no insurance so I couldn't afford paraquard. Condoms were a no go as my gyno doesn't want me using them due to lichen sclerosus. Look it up its terrible it's also very advanced. She said the condom rubbing against me even with proper lubes can catch and RIP my super thin skin. Under her guidance I started the calendar method 2 years ago and once a year test for 3 months straight to make sure my calendar is correct and we were not sexually involved during fertile times. Now I'm a week late and scared to tell my bf as he doesnt want anymore kids. I haven't tested yet as I want him to be there when I did. How do I approach him with this? I love him and I'm afraid I'll lose him. He is a loving stable man and I'll understand his reaction wouldn't be positive I dont think mine will either as I planned on no kids myself. I'm terrified of being like my abusive parent that I grew up with. 

6 Answers

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  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    1 month ago
    Favourite answer

    i would just come right out and tell him

  • 1 month ago

    Test first. Dont jump the gun and get him worried till you test.

  • 1 month ago

    Not to mention those contraceptive gels aren't good on lichen sclerosus. They can mess with the balance of ph and hormones. I'm assuming you didnt read up on my auto immune disease either. He was well aware of the situation if I was trying to get pregnant wouldn't I have been pregnant 2 years ago instead of now while I'm unemployed, no health insurance. Trying to get pregnant in that scenario is very stupid idea. yes doctors recommend the calendar method especially if your medical condition prevents basic usage. We couldn't use condoms as I had torn before and required stitching. My gyno showed me how to do it right and my chances of pregnancy was low about the same as someone using birth control or just the condom. Most people who did the calendar method do not do it right. Your suppose to track for 3 months use the ovulation tests and we avoided sex during ovulation week. With that being said I have scheduled a day at planned parenthood to get checked out to see how everything is to make sure this is a viable pregnancy. We are going to wait until I'm 4 months along before telling the kids as my family has a huge history of miscarriages but I think I'm safe as my sister heavily smoked during those pregnancies. I'm not a smoker. I showed my boyfriend some of your answers and he laughed. He said he be more suspicious if I had gotten pregnant in the first 3 months of dating when his youngest sons mom tried to trap him in getting married to her. It didnt work out for them I still dont want marriage and neither does he. This is truly and accidentally pregnancy and he is super excited to see if were having a boy or girl and already asked about names as his ex didnt allow him to be apart of the naming process for his sons.

  • Ricky
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    Haha your gonna be one of those single mothers. Wise choice 

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  • drip
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    If he doesn’t want any more kids he should have a vasectomy.  

    Assuming he knew of your medical problems with birth control and he knew you were only using rhythm method, then he should not be too surprise. With the rhythm method soon or later It doesn’t work. 

    I can’t imagine any doctor recommending it. 

    And a “loving stable man” would give support.

  • 1 month ago

    Well, it appears you've got your excuses already laid out. But it's suspicious you didn't go with any of the other half dozens forms of bc like a diaphragm, IUD, contraceptive foam/gel, etc. And I haven't heard of any doctor advising the rhythm method since the 1950s. 😒  If he's smart, he'll be asking you the same thing.

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