Anonymous asked in Pregnancy & ParentingParenting · 2 months ago

Is it normal for 13 year old healthy child to pee the bed ?

He is still peeing the bed. I’m ready to throw in the towel on this kid. He’s so lazy at night. Please help. How can I motivate him to use the bathroom at night 

16 Answers

  • 1 month ago

    He needs to be checked out by a MD and needs Counselling by a behavior specialist to determine if there's a psychological problem he is contending with. He may appear "healthy" physically however, emotionally / psychologically is may not be. 

  • 2 months ago

    He either has a medical problem like a urinary tract infection or something has happened to him that's causing the bed wetting. Has he lost a family member or something because if so, that's probably the cause. You may also have to ask him if someone is being cruel to him because abuse can be a trigger too. I'm not saying that you're abusing him but the abuse could be happening elsewhere such as at school, at one of his extracurricular activities, or even at another relatives house.

  • 2 months ago

    no it is not :)

  • Zapata
    Lv 6
    2 months ago

    It is not common for a child of that age to pee the bed, but it is certainly not unheard of. 

    You seem to assume it is due to simple laziness...but I doubt very much that it is down to him not caring about it. Apart from anything else, it quickly become extremely uncomfortable to try to sleep in a wet bed. I would suggest there may well be a physical or psychological reason for it, so maybe a visit to the doctor may prove useful. You also need to change the way you react to sound like you get angry with him, but you need to be empathetic with your son and more helpful. Right now he is probably more embarrassed and shamed than merely "lazy". 

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  • 2 months ago

    FIRST: take your child to the doctor and let him or her know what's going on. There may be an actual MEDICAL reason he does this. If not, then you absolutely MUST stop shaming, or trying to "motivate" him to stop. He cannot help it. Buy plastic mattress covers. Get a box of incontinence underwear he can wear for sleeping in. Stop making an ISSUE of it. Anxiety can make the problem far worse. Eventually it WILL stop. It may take a while. But you have to back off. 

    The incontinence underwear you get at the drugstore or grocers is great--keeps the bed dry, and solves the problem 100%.  You don't have to wake him up, or try to do any other 'motivation.' 

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    Not normal. But not uncommon .

      I had the problem until age 16 . I had a small bladder and slept deeply.   I hope your not teasing him.

       I am sure your child would like the problem to go away more than you do.

       Be supporting, stop saying he or she is lazy . That’s not helping  . My dad would embarrass me in front of others . My mom helped me by getting me up at night.

      And also no liquids before bed.

       There will be a time when this goes away , how your child sees you in the future will depend on how you help your child or not.

        You can always see a doctor to help your child .


  • 2 months ago

    you need to let him use the restroom just right when he is about to sleep. if he has to pee, why doesn't he just get up instead of peeing on the bed?

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    Speaking as former enuretic (bed wetter) myself, I can tell you that no, it's not "normal", but it's also NOT the child's fault. Enuresis (which is the medical name for bed wetting) is associated with a long list of medical conditions, some of which are fatal if left untreated. You need to have this child (I'm assuming he's your son) medically evaluated, and said evaluation needs to include testing for diabetes, kidney disease, seizure disorders, AND a medically supervised sleep study to determine the real cause of his issue. The sleep study is particularly important, because it allow the doctor(s) to learn if your son has the dangerous condition called obstructive sleep apnea, or OSA. In OSA, the person stops breathing for periods of up to a minute while deeply asleep, and in certain patients enuresis can occur because of the relaxation of the muscles that control the bladder. The danger comes from the fact that sometimes, people with OSA don't reawaken- which can result in brain damage and death. There is a connection between OSA and SIDS (sudden infant death syndrome) in babies and toddlers, too. Even when a person who has OSA does jerk themselves awake, the disorder is still risky. Instead of sleeping normally, most OSA sufferers will go through repeated periods of apnea followed by jerking themselves awake from lack of oxygen. The quality of the sleep they do get becomes very poor, and their overall health declines. OSA has NOTHING to do with laziness or anti-social behavior, and neither does enuresis. It is treated by the patient wearing a CPAP mask/device to keep his/her airway open and keep him/her from going into the deep sleep phase where the disorder occurs.

    If your son checks out medically, then chances are VERY HIGH that the bed wetting or enuresis is HEREDITARY. Mine certainly was. I was enuretic because my dad suffered from the same disorder when he was a teenager, and I inherited one of the 3 genes that cause the disorder from him at conception. Current research indicates that around 1 in 5 American children will suffer at least one episode of hereditary enuresis prior to reaching the age of 18. There are believed to be as many as 3 genes that cause it- one of which was successfully identified in 1995 by researchers at the University of Michigan. That particular one causes about one third of all cases of the disorder, and the hunt is on to find the other two. Some kids also suffer from a related problem caused by a lack of maturation as well. For these kids, the issue isn't that they have the genes that cause the disorder, it's that their nervous systems and the muscles they control haven't matured enough yet to prevent issues with bed wetting. It's POSSIBLE that your son could be experiencing this, too. Either way, punishing the boy because of the disorder is a very CRUEL thing to do- and a sign of real emotional IMMATURITY on YOUR PART. My parents put ME through Hell because of the enuresis- I was punished almost every night, viciously, for 5 years. I learned to do my own laundry years before my siblings did, because that allowed me to hide at least some of the evidence of the disorder. And I learned young how to hide, and how to fib about it- not because I wanted to, but as a survival tactic. The alternative was to put up with being beaten with all sorts of objects that I won't mention here. And the worst part about what I went through was that IT DIDN'T SOLVE THE PROBLEM- it MADE IT MUCH WORSE than it should have been. The abuse (and it was abuse) nearly drove me to SUICIDE, in fact. The only thing that SAVED ME in the end was that I eventually OUTGREW the disorder, which is what will likely happen to your son. PLEASE, for your child's sake, DON'T MAKE THE MISTAKES that my parents did. Because you'll really regret them later on. No one ever deserves to be hit and hurt for something like this.

    Source(s): Personal experience. I suffered from enuresis (bed wetting) for 5 years as a teenager.
  • 2 months ago

    I had the same problem and this is the advice my father gave to me, "the wealthiest camel has the biggest hump" :)

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    It’s not normal, and no child chooses to wet the bed. Bedwetting in children older than 5 is usually a sign of a health problem, either physical or emotional, and it can also be a sign of abuse. Take him to a doctor to get it checked out.

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