Should I notify my lecturers/teachers on my dad's Death? ?

I lost my dad just over a week ago after a long battle with cancer, I have taken it pretty badly. I'm 19 years old and just about to return to college, im worried that my course work may slack or I might not seem quite myself on my return. I'm unsure whether or not I should inform my head of department and ask him to pass on this message. If so how should I approach this?

23 Answers

  • 1 month ago

    I'm very sorry you lost your father. BUT--wait and see. You may or may not need to tell someone about it. If your work suffers, or if you are having a hard time, there is no shame in dropping a class or two for a semester, or in trying to explain the reasons to your professors and instructors. You do not have to make a blanket announcement. Tell them individually, depending on the situation. That's all you need to do. Grieve at your OWN pace--but try to do your best, if you can. You can also utilize your college's mental health assistance in the process. Bless you. 

  • Sarah
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Yes, you should. I'm very sorry for your loss. When I was 18, my grandma had a surgery that resulted in infections and she died within a month. I emailed each of my professors individually, but that was more to let them know that I might be absent so I could go to the funeral. 

    I would imagine losing your dad might be even harder. I would recommend emailing your advisor, the head of department, and each of your professors yourself because I just think it sounds more professional and you can be sure the email says what you want it to say. I also felt that I could connect more with my professors by telling them directly and I just felt more assured that everything could be taken care of. However, you should definitely make it known that you're having a hard time, and you should do it ASAP. If you don't notify them at the beginning of the semester, your professors might not know something is going on with you and may not give as much help to you as they could.

  • 1 month ago

    I would contact each professor as say something along the lines of: 

    "I lost my father after a long battle with cancer last week and I am worried that it is going to affect my performance.  I am reaching out to you to see if there is any way we can plan for any problems I may wind up having as a result of this.  I do not want to have my performance negatively impacted because of the grieving process, stress, anxiety, and depression that may be in store.  However, I want to continue with my studies and succeed."

    I would definitely work with you if I got something like that.

  • 1 month ago

    Since your classes may be online this fall anyway, this might be a good semester to take a leave of absence. Give yourself time to grieve and get over your loss and adjust to your new normal. Classes may resume on campus in the spring (although I wouldn't count on it) and you can return to school then if you feel like you're ready.

  • What do you think of the answers? You can sign in to give your opinion on the answer.
  • drip
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Most universities have a Dean of Students. If you notify them, they will notify your teachers. You could talk to your college adviser. Or if you do feel more comfortable talking to the your head of department then do so.  Let them know about the death and that you may not be yourself. They may also may have grief counseling on campus. 

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    I suggest you drop out of college before you flunk out, and don't go back to school.

    I been to college, and I know from experience how hard it is. If you are not going to take something seriously then do yourself a favor, and just don't go back to college.

    I graduated from college when I was 21 years old. When I was a college student I took college very seriously, and I became an A college student.

    I am also self taught too, so I am much more educated. I learned a certain amount of stuff at college, and I learned even more stuff on my own.

  • 1 month ago

    In the real world people die every day, you should not expect special treatment.

  • 1 month ago

    Sorry for your loss. Some people find getting to work, hard work, is their best antidote to grief. Or it gives them new motivation to achieve. Some people just need more time to process their grief before they can move on. You need to determine whether you are ready & willing to dive deep into school, work through your grief, or whether you should delay returning to school for a semester.

  • 1 month ago

    I'm sorry for your loss, Chloe.

    It's a tough one, but I'm going to say no.

    What do you expect them to do with the information? They may take it as a bid for sympathy: like you're asking them for favors such as turning in assignments late, allowing you to skip class, or giving you a higher grade than you earn. 

    They can't do that, and you shouldn't ask them to, or even seem like you're asking them to. 

    If you really think your work will be negatively affected, then consider applying for a "leave of absence" this semester. Many colleges allow this upon request, but if you need "good cause" you can bring up your father's death and the emotional and financial instability this causes for you. 

  • 1 month ago

    Well I'm sure they would sympathize with you but telling your teachers will do absolutely nothing.  They have a job to do and that is teach. Not sure what you would expect in return by telling your teachers. Maybe a free Final grade of A?

Still have questions? Get answers by asking now.