My Filipino wife is working in Canada from 3 years & her attitude towards me was not favorable & now she is not communicating from 2 months?

I married to Filipino lady (single status) now aged 46 years ago in Philippines...My age is 58 years (currently retired)...Life went normal for 3/4 years after marriage...we were staying together with my bed-ridden mother...we have no big financial or family issue...she went to her home town twice from Manila she got proposal from her Aunti Canada Citizen to work as Live-In Home Care Giver in Toronto, Canada (4 years ago)...she managed to migrate to Canada from India 3 years ago...her behavior & attitude were quite different from the time of migrating process from last 4 years...there is arguments on small things all times...I support her financially INR 3 Lakhs utilized to help her brother in Philippines to set up a piggery farm almost 6 years ago...I also financed her to migrate Canada with another 4 Lakhs...We mutually agreed that she will pay back 7 lakhs to me in India once she start having savings from her job...The life is going as hell to me with lot of arguments & quarrelling as she attitude was not good to me and she never pay back INR 7 lakhs even after a job of two years in Canada...after lot of effort I managed to get INR 4 Lakhs...Her earning is more than CAD 2500 per month + overtime & incentives...Savings with her is CAD 87500 or say INR 46 Lakhs...she don't have any liability as she is live-in Home Care Giver...She don't want to declare her savings and now she is not communicating at all...Please suggest my NEXT step.. 

2 Answers

  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    Sounds like maybe she's just too passive-aggressive to ask for the divorce she seems to want. However, as divorce is generally not allowed in the Philippines maybe she just doesn't realize that's available to her (at least as far as India or Canada are concerned).

  • Anonymous
    3 months ago

    Ok man I'm gonna tell you something with 'Qualification', so brace yourself for some brutally blunt reality.

    Loosely translated, I'm a Western guy that's been living Expat fashion in the Philippines for over ten years.

    And,, in typical Expat fashion,

     even married a local girl about half my age when I was in my mid-50s.

    And,, of course things couldn't be better & I have no regrets,

    due in part because I was "Lucky" and because I didn't make the mistake of expatriating my bride to the West. 

    Of course nobody has to tell me that not all Filippina are the same,, of course they're not,,

    but that that doesn't mean that they aren't notorious for haven certain commonalities.

    One among those commonalities is the Cultural issue that Filipinos have with "All Things Family". And that's a commonality that gives validity to the saying,, "You can take the girl out of the Islands but you will never get the Islands out of the Girl"   

    So,, you took her to "India" when you married yours? ,, OMG Dude! You DEFINATLY should have done some homework before even considering that.

    Because if there is any other commonality that Filippina are notorious for it is NOT aspiring to leave their own homeland to live Anywhere but the "West" where Western People are typically stereotyped as all Rich & living in Disneyland with rock-stars & movie celebrities for neighbors.

    In other words,, You got USED.

    Step one, was getting out of the Philippines at Your expense,, not to mention getting you to shell-out for the support of a family member or two.

    And Step Two, was the convenient 'Auntie' in Canada with an inside assist to getting established where she wanted to go in the first place, and if she'd had an Auntie in U.S.A. you can be sure she would have gone there instead since that is typically the preferred destination.

    Frankly, that old "Helping her brother to invest in a 'Piggery" hook is such a classic sham that I couldn't help but laugh & shake my head as I read about it in your question.

    And it's easy to presume that it wasn't the only time you got mooched on to pacify a hard-luck story about a relative once she gazed into your eyes & realized that you had 'STUPID' written all over your face!

    I don't know how much time you spent online yucking-it-up before going to the Phils to marry that girl but you were incredibly Naïve not to know that Filippinas would typically NEVER even consider hooking-up with a Hindi-type or Middle-Eastern guy unless she knows she has him totally scammed.

    Even though, for every Success Story about  Filippinas & Western Men there are at least a Thousand Horror stories that are allot worse than Yours. 

    So in answer to your question about what your "Next Step" should be.

    First,, Kiss your Lakhs goodbye, your money is gone forever and it's Never coming back.

    Next, DON'T give her or her relatives any more Lakhs (whatever that is) No matter what she says,,

    because no matter what she says SHE is Also gone forever and never coming back! 

    Next, is up to you  but I suggest speaking to an attorney to get divorced from her as fast as possible before she is able to figure out how to use her marital status to screw you out of even More Lakhs than she already has.

    Next, get your mind around the fact that she's NOT your girl any more and that she is most likely with a dumb Canadian guy already or working full-time online smoozing some stupid American guy to get her moved to where she Really wants to go.                                                                                                                                                                                                                Next step,  Learn enough from your mistake to stay away from Filippinas until you know what you're frkn doing, or are at-least ready to consider expatriating to 'Her' country.                 Because Filippina women are allot more sophisticated than you think,,,practically born with a cellphone in their hand with the common illusion that having a smartphone somehow makes them smarter and they actually Know how to Google and even browse around in social sites maintaining sugar-daddy relationships with several different men at once online.                                                                                                                                                                And make no mistake about it Guy,, Filippina Women are very well aware that Hindi-types & Middle-eastern men are notoriously famous for Sexualizing Filipina Women & treating them less like a Wives & GFs and more like whores while subjugating them into domestic servitude.                                                                                                                                           So, Nothing personal man,, but all things considered from the information in your question, it's not really all that surprising that she left you,, I suggest cutting your losses & just it let go.     

Still have questions? Get answers by asking now.