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Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 2 months ago

I really want to have a baby but my mom thinks I shouldn’t?

I’m 24 and got married not too long ago. I’ve been with my husband for 7 years though. I’ve always felt like I wanted to be a mom more than anything but my mom thinks I should wait and that I’m too young. Which she definitely has a point I am very young. However I believe we could financially support a baby. Should I just wait it out a few years or start trying now? Am I really too young? 

Update:

Y’all I didn’t ask for her permission 😂😂 she’s the one who gives her input because she says she had kids too young and regrets it. Never did I ever ASK her if I should 😂

19 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    24 years old is NOT 14. It's time to grow UP and be an ADULT, and stop looking to your mom for approval of everything you do in life. If you and your husband want to have a child, you should do so, as long as you can support a child. Your mom needs to come to terms with what happened on her own.

    It'll be much easier at your age to get pregnant and have a healthy baby than it will be later on, because as you age, your fertility drops off drastically. And there is less chance of birth defects in the baby if you have a child now.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    She's right  ( your mum)because you're young and the fact is get your career first... Then kids

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    While I would take the advice of your mother into consideration, ultimately it is you and your husband's decision, given that you are married and have your own life now. You have discuss it as a couple, and reach a decision on your own. 

  • GB
    Lv 5
    2 months ago

    I was born less than a month before my mother's 24th birthday, and no one thought she was too young. If you and your husband want to start trying for a baby, go for it.

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  • L
    Lv 5
    2 months ago

    This is a decision only you and your husband can make............not your mom.

    24 is not to young to have a child.  You will have a child when you and your husband are ready to have one.

  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    Technically your brain won't be fully developed for about another year so maybe make your 25th birthday the day when you make this decision. But "I believe we could financially support a baby" doesn't necessarily mean you can. The threshold is that you: 1) can afford to live in a decent school district... 2) have the ability to provide full medical insurance coverage for yourselves and your child... 3) have factored in the cost of daycare, which is on average about $225 a week (depending on where you live)... 4) have $1157 a month in disposable income because that's what it'll cost you to raise a child effectively. On top of that you'll need another $462 per month that you deposit into a tax deferred 529 college savings account as the $250,000 it costs to raise a child from 0 to 18 doesn't include post secondary education. If all of these conditions are present then you can afford to have a baby. 

  • Blush
    Lv 6
    2 months ago

    Babies are cute but think about saying goodbye to childless life. It’s a lot to give up at 24

  • ?
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    I think you are allowing your Mom too much stage time here-

    You are an adult, one in which is capable of making her own choices and dealing with the consquences! Your Mom can have her opinion on things, but, she doesn't get a vote however, it is NOT her decision to make one way or the other, you need to stop giving her so much power here.

    You are in a committed marraige, you aren't that young, and you have the financial means to raise a child.... I fail to see the issue here. It's not like you went out and had a friday night **** at 16 and have no means to raise a child, the difference is you want a child and can raise one.

    My sister had her first child at 24, and she didn't regret it! Both her and her husband were in a committed relationship, owned a home, had successful/well paying jobs etc. My oldest niece is turning 8 later this spring, and both of them have done an excellent job raising her, no issues whatsoever.

    Go for it.

  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    i think you should do what you want

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    First, you've already proven you're not ready by listening to what your mom says.  The only other person who gets a vote on this topic is your husband.  At 24, you're at the age where people start learning to set boundaries with parents and create an adult/adult relationship.  If I was your husband, I wouldn't be very happy that you're discussing such a personal issue with mommy!

    With that said, it might be too soon, but this isn't about your age.  You said you got married "not too long ago", which is pretty vague, but most couples plan for at least a year of adjusting to marriage before bringing a baby into it.  If there are trips you want to take, or any kind of adventure, now is the time to do it.  Also, babies are obviously awesome, but they do come with a lot of stress in those early months.  You give your marriage the best chance if you make sure no issues or problem arise between the 2 of  you before adding this stress.

    Whatever you decide, keep reminding yourself this is nobody's business except you and him.

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