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Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 month ago

how to deal with annoying entitled sister?

So for perspective she is 25 I'm 19, and she is so immature. She never puts in the effort or work into her career, for example she got yelled at by her supervisor because she was CALLING HER FRIEND DURING A MEETING. I know, and what makes this funnier is that she's mad at her supervisor and keeps crying about it, literally taking no accountability, and now shes looking for a 6 figure software job with a 2. something psychology degree. Honestly I dont even care about that, but then she starts yelling at my parents for making her pay only 600 in rent, shes making 1600 biweekly, and then she blows it out of proportion and acts like shes funding them because she doesnt know how to budget. She spent 2k on junk food, and random clothes that dont even fit her. And then blames her weight gain on her schizophrenia meds, which she also blames on my parents for 'ratting her out for help'. WTF. 

She doesn't take accountability for anything, and this is the thing. EVERYTHING REVOLVES AROUND HER. I dont even care about her, like nobody would in real life. But im constantly in her shadows, all my parents care about is her, they always have her back in everything. Sometimes I wonder if I even matter, like I got into university, having to spend a year remotely, and shes always the victim? She got to enjoy her youth, always the centre of attention, and im always in her shadows. How do I even deal with this

3 Answers

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago
    Favourite answer

    It sucks when this happens, and it's also true that your parents have made some big mistakes with each of you.  But when there's a "bad" kid and a "good" kid, it's normal for parents to focus on the bad one.  It's unfair and upsetting, esp when the good kid is much younger, but in a way, it proves how much your parents trust you.  Right now, they have to focus on an older sister who is overdue to be out on her own, having fun, starting a career, maybe finding a guy, etc.  It sounds like she's nowhere near ready for this.  What if she never is?  Your parents are getting older and probably had plans for retirement and taking things easy.  They may never get this.  Part of it is their own fault (like always having her back), and they probably see this, too.  So there's guilt involved. 

    Also, when you say you're always in her shadow, I see why you feel this way, but one thing you don't realize yet (even tho you sound quite mature!) is that she is miserable and always has been. I'm sure you hate her at times, but remind yourself she probably will never be happy.  YOU have the tools to achieve this, and you will as soon as you're out of there and experiencing the challenging but very fun life of a young adult.  Finally, the stupid pandemic is making all this worse for you.  Hopefully things will open up soon so you can start enjoying college life.  

  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    maybe you should talk to your parents about it

  • 1 month ago

    You are the mature, sane, child that your parents don't have to worry about.  They are very thankful for you.  Don't start acting like you're being neglected because your older sister can't cross the street with Mommy and Daddy holding her hands.  Stay strong and stay away from the drama.

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